You're about to let a stranger into your parent's home. They'll have access to the house, to personal information, possibly to medications and finances. They'll be alone with someone you love who may be vulnerable.
No pressure, right?
Vetting a caregiver feels overwhelming because the stakes are high. But it doesn't have to be complicated. Here's a straightforward process that covers the essentials without requiring a private investigator.
Step 1: The application and initial screen
Before you talk to anyone, collect basic information. You can use a simple Google Form or just ask via email:
- Full legal name, phone number, email, address
- Do they have reliable transportation?
- What's their availability?
- Experience with elderly care (describe briefly)
- Why are they interested in caregiving?
- Are they willing to undergo a background check?
- 2-3 references (preferably from care-related work)
This weeds out people who aren't serious or don't meet basic requirements. Anyone who balks at a background check question? That's a red flag right there.
Step 2: The phone screen
A quick 10-15 minute call before investing time in a full interview. You're checking for:
- Communication: Can they hold a conversation? Are they pleasant to talk to?
- Reliability signals: Did they answer or call back promptly?
- Basic fit: Does their availability actually work? Do they understand the role?
- Red flags: Vague answers about past work, unwillingness to discuss experience
Trust your instincts. If something feels off, it's okay to pass.
Step 3: Reference checks
Actually call the references. Many people skip this—don't.
Questions to ask references:
- How do you know [candidate]?
- What was their role and how long did they work with you?
- How would you describe their reliability?
- How did they handle difficult situations or emergencies?
- What are their strengths? Any areas for improvement?
- Would you hire them again?
Listen for hesitation. "Would you hire them again?" is the most telling question—if there's a pause or hedging, pay attention.
Be aware: Some candidates list friends or family as "references." Try to verify the reference actually supervised their care work.
Step 4: The in-person interview
If they've passed the screen and references, bring them in for a proper interview—ideally at the home where they'd be working, with the senior present for at least part of it.
Questions to ask:
- "Walk me through a typical day with your last client."
- "How do you handle it when a client refuses to take medication or eat?"
- "Tell me about a time something went wrong. What happened and what did you do?"
- "What would you do if [senior's name] fell while you were here?"
- "How do you handle confidentiality with a client's personal and medical information?"
The senior's reaction matters a lot. After the interview, ask your parent what they thought.
Step 5: Background check
This is non-negotiable. A proper background check should include:
- Criminal history check: National and state-level
- Sex offender registry: National database
- Social Security verification: Confirms identity
- Driving record: If they'll be transporting your parent
Services like Checkr, GoodHire, or Sterling can run comprehensive checks for $30-75.
Important: A clean background check doesn't guarantee a great caregiver, and a minor past issue doesn't necessarily disqualify someone. Use it as one piece of information, not the only piece.
Step 6: Trial period
Before committing long-term, do a trial. A few shifts where you or another family member can observe (at least initially) and check in frequently.
During the trial, watch for:
- Punctuality and reliability
- How they interact with your parent when they think no one's watching
- Whether they follow instructions about medications, meals, routines
- Communication—do they update you proactively?
- Your parent's comfort level and mood
Red flags to watch for
- Gaps in employment they can't explain
- Reluctance to provide references or undergo background check
- Speaking negatively about past clients or employers
- Showing up late to the interview
- Vague answers about experience
- Pushing for cash payment only
- Your parent expressing discomfort (take this seriously)
The bottom line
Vetting a caregiver takes time—probably 2-4 hours of real work per serious candidate. That investment is worth it. You're protecting your parent and giving yourself peace of mind.
Don't rush it. Don't skip steps because someone "seems nice." And trust your gut—if something feels off, keep looking.